Huh?

The last few days a revelation has come to me. It's one of those ones that kind of hits you, but then over the next few days it becomes more and more apparent and possibly even easier to understand. It's not really a mystery, I should have seen it coming, I just never thought about it until the other night. And then again Wed. And then again tonight.

I enjoy being confused.

I know, that doesn't sound like it makes much sense (which adds to the confusion), but trust me, it's true. I like not knowing. I like trying to "figure it out." Then I like that moment, that all encompassing fleeting moment when comprehension suddenly kicks you in the back of the head and you do all you can to stop from shouting, "OH!"

I think part of the reason I like this feeling is because it reminds me I'm not in control. I don't know it all. I don't have it all figured out. Then, suddenly, this burst of intelligence sweeps in and for a small, tiny, insignificant microsecond, I feel as if I totally understand. Then something else happens and I'm back to square one.

And we admit it too. Well, most people. There's always that person that claims they saw the end of the movie coming (and I know, sometimes it's so Hollywood predictable I do too, but some people claim to know it every single time.) There are the people that know everything, even the answer to the question before it's posed. And somehow they enjoy that. But where's the adventure? Where's the mystery? Where's the excitement of life if you always know what's coming next?

And yet, for some incredibly strange reason, we can admit we didn't see the end of a movie coming, but we think we have God all figured out. Maybe that's why I love the end of Job (ch.36 on.) Read it today if you can, I love it. Especially one little verse at the start of the section...

Job 36:26a ~ "Look, God is greater than we can understand." (from a wise young man named Elihu)

T