Only When I Struggle

This morning I did what I do almost every morning. I came downstairs and said good morning to our little bunny Clover. You have to say good morning to him because every morning we give him a piece of papaya (it helps with his digestion) and to him it's a treat that he suffers a small addiction to, so if you forget, he will remind you by banging his cage, throwing his ball, anything that makes noise to get your attention and remind you he needs his papaya (I think our bunny has a couple of addictions to his treats...)

After doing this I picked him up and held him and pet him and had a little bit of bunny bonding time (as Lorie calls it). Clover likes being held, but he doesn't like being picked up or put down. When he doesn't feel the comfort of being held tight he gets a little worried. And this morning I found myself saying, "It's okay, I've never dropped you."

But that's not true. I've dropped him. Lots of times. One time I even broke one of his claws and Lorie was worried because he was bleeding and all sorts of trauma ensued. But I said it. And as I was thinking about it I realized something. The only times I drop Clover is when he freaks out and struggles. If he lets me pick him up or put him down, he's fine (like today). But if I start to put him down and he feels scared or a sense of I don't have him, he tries to get to the ground his own way, which doesn't work the best.

I started wondering how often we do that with God. He is holding us. He has us in His hands. But then He moves us ever so slightly. We need to be moved, but it's uncomfortable for us, so what do we do? We kick. We struggle. We claw our way out of His hands. And then we wonder why we hit the ground and we wonder how "God could have hurt us". It's not God. It's us. We have to trust that when things aren't going the way we think they should He is still holding us and we have to keep trusting in His hands. Otherwise we hit the ground...

T